Couples Therapy
You And Your Partner Can Find A Pathway Back To Each Other
Has it felt like you and your partner keep missing each other? Do little arguments morph into cold silences and simmering resentment? Do you crave the safety, understanding, and intimacy you once shared?
You are not alone. No matter where you are in your relationship journey—whether it be newly dating, engaged, newlyweds, or decades together, the fact remains that romantic relationships are complicated. Even the healthiest relationships experience periods of disconnect. The passions of early romance mellow into the rhythms of domesticity. You might be thinking to yourself, “is it supposed to be this hard?” as you find yourselves grieving the connection that you once had or long to revive. For the first time, you may be wondering if it’s time to see a couples therapist.
When Your Relationship Isn’t Stable, Everything Else Feels Out Of Balance
In many ways, your romantic relationship acts as a foundation of wellness in your life. It’s a safe haven in times of pain, a safeguard against the stressors of the outside world. When your relationship is on rocky soil, everything else in your life—your job, your friendships, and your overall health—can feel out of balance.
If you want to regain stability in your relationship or marriage, I encourage you to pursue therapy with me. With my help and support, I’m confident that you and your partner can deepen your emotional bond, learn healthier ways to handle conflict, and start to feel safe and valued in each other’s eyes.
Many Couples Have Not Been Taught How To Handle Conflict
When conflict shakes your relationship, it can feel like the ground is crumbling beneath you. However, the way you respond in these treacherous moments defines your partnership. With compassion and effort, you can learn to turn towards each other, not away.
Unfortunately, most couples struggle to navigate conflict for a variety of reasons. Oftentimes, that’s because they didn’t have healthy relationships and conflict resolution modeled for them. Even the happiest couples argue sometimes. This is natural—you are two unique individuals joining your lives together. Friction is inevitable. Fighting, criticizing, withdrawing, and avoiding serve to only further rupture the bond between you. This leaves you stranded, feeling misunderstood, unheard, and alone.
Rebuild Broken Bonds To Weather Relationship Storms
Trust is the foundation of any lasting relationship. When trust crumbles after lies, betrayal, or repeated misunderstandings, the wounds cut deep. Sadly, divorce has become more prevalent than not—leaving broken relationships, families, and hopes in its wake. In southern California, some might say that the sanctity of marriage has become a suggestion rather than a vow. Part of the problem is that many couples don’t seek help when their marriage hits rough terrain or don’t preventatively seek guidance while dating.
That’s why counseling is so vital. It can help you and your partner work through your stuck points so that your relationship is rich with longevity. In therapy, you will learn to discuss issues calmly, express needs lovingly, restore emotional safety, manage differences respectfully, and solve problems as a team.
Couples Therapy Can Help Your Relationship Become A Safe Haven Of Love And Connection
In our culture, dependence is seen as weakness. Yet no one can journey alone. Humans are wired for connection, contact, and care. Like trees with intertwined roots, we thrive through interdependence.
Counseling nurtures this rooted bond. True strength comes from embracing vulnerability. When couples nurture interdependence, each person can stand tall as an individual, yet turn to the other in times of need.
Counseling can help you and your partner learn to become interdependent by developing deeper empathy for each other, enhancing your intimacy, and building new patterns of connection. Whether you’re in a relationship, engaged, or already married, I would be honored to help both of you improve communication, foster more secure attachments, and fall back in love.
What To Expect In Couples Counseling Sessions
When we begin, I will meet with you and your significant other together to go over your needs and goals for couples therapy. Afterward, I will hold a separate session with each of you individually. The goal of these separate sessions is to further assess each person’s attachment history and traumas which provide valuable information and context when approaching the couple relationship as a whole. When that’s done, we’ll resume meeting together.
The cornerstone of my couples counseling approach is Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT). Research shows EFT is highly effective—it has earned the American Psychological Association's Gold Standard for improving relationship distress. Studies find 70-75% of couples move from distress to recovery with EFT, and around 90% experience significant improvements that last over time.*
What makes EFT so powerful? It looks deeply into how your attachment styles shape negative patterns in your partnership. EFT draws from attachment theory, systems thinking, and existential philosophy to help couples heal at the core.
In sessions, I create a safe space for you and your partner to reconnect. You can air grievances, understand each other's inner worlds, and move forward with mutual care and respect. I guide you to be fully present—looking into each other's eyes, speaking from the heart, and listening generously without judgement.
This presence awakens empathy and gratitude. You can let go of past hurts and truly see each other once again. With EFT's proven techniques, you'll gain insight into your dynamics and make lasting change. Together, we'll unravel old wounds so you can build the skills for lifelong intimacy.
My goal is to help you become each other’s co-pilots, able to work together as a team through the ups and downs of your journey. When this happens, your relationship can become a source of joy and a safe haven in times of need.
**https://iceeft.com/eft-research-3/
You May Have Some Questions About Marriage And Couples Counseling…
How long will this take?
Emotionally Focused Therapy is often a short-term form of couples therapy. How long it takes depends on your trauma histories, communication skills, and many other factors. Together, we will come up with a roadmap that suits your needs and goals and allows you and your partner to work through your issues at a pace that’s right for you.
Will therapy involve blaming or taking sides?
In couples therapy, the client is the relationship, not the individuals who form it. My focus is on creating a balanced alliance where both you and your partner feel heard, understood, and validated. With that said, I’m here to support the growth and wellbeing of your relationship as a whole, which requires looking at both of your contributions to the negative cycle that has formed.
Will couples therapy be able to fix our relationship?
Couples Therapy is not about fixing your relationship but repairing and “updating” it to stand the test of time. We’re both mending and creating something new, allowing you to utilize the things you already do well while making space for new patterns to emerge. By gaining insight and fostering a deeper emotional connection, you can experience transformative shifts in your relationship.
You Deserve To Feel Loved, Valued, And Appreciated
Couples counseling is the place to foster trust, intimacy, and a deeper appreciation for each other. To begin the healing process, you can email me or call 949-342-6672. I look forward to working with you!
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